I was just reading Groong and came across this story which is so ridiculous that I had to share it with you:
Azeri spokesman says Bin-Ladin may be in breakaway Karabakh
ANS TV
16 Feb 02
[snip snip]
The head of the [Azerbaijani] Foreign Ministry press service, Matin Mirza, has said that reports about Bin-Ladin's whereabouts in the Caucasus region are dangerous for Azerbaijan, too, because following 11 September events our country is one of those states that immediately supported official Washington in anti-terrorist operations. Mirza noted that combating terrorism is one of the priority issues for Azerbaijan too. As far as the theory that Bin-Ladin's is hiding on the uncontrolled Nagornyy Karabakh territory was concerned, Mirza did not rule this out. Anything can take place on this territory which is under Armenian occupation: from the cultivation of narcotic substances to the burial of atomic waste. Everyone knows that Nagornyy Karabakh has turned into a nest of Armenian terrorists and mercenaries. Azerbaijan is unable to control this territory because the conflict remains unsettled. That is why Azerbaijan is not responsible for crimes committed on the occupied territories, end quote. Esmira Namiqqizi, ANS.
First of all, I would like to say that I am saddened that Bin-Ladin has not come here, because I think turning his body over to the authorities for the $25 million reward would be very helpful to our economy and bring us that much closer to international recognition as an independent nation.
I don�t know who �everyone� is that that Mirza feels that Artsakh is a "nest for terrorists and mercenaries"? I'm sure Mirza is referring to the people that work at Azerbaijan�s MFA.
Mirza is right when saying that they can�t control Artsakh, because it�s not theirs to control. In addition to that, Mirza can rest easy tonight knowing we would never hold Azerbaijan responsible for crimes committed here if they didn�t commit them (that�s for Artsakh�s recognized legal system to determine who is guilty of crimes committed here). And what conflict is Mirza talking about? We settled our conflict with Azerbaijan in 1994. If Mirza meant to say "dispute" over who land belongs to, I can't argue with that. BTW: When are you going to vacate our Shahoumyan region that you occupy?
Oh Mirza, of you happen to read this, here is a little unsolicited advice from me. It�s not a good idea for people who live in glass houses to throw stones. If you didn't understand that, then maybe you will understand the saying that the Western oil companies say about it not being a good idea to play with fire when standing in an oilfield full of oil when you lack a viable way to transport it to the West.
I took a few minutes to write down my top ten reasons why Bin-Ladin is not in Artsakh and this story can�t be true.
10. America would cut off the millions of dollars of aid it gives to Artsakh without evidence.
9. The story is so far fetched that even President Bush and Aliev don�t believe it.
8. Armenians can�t keep secrets and we all would have already heard about it.
7. Artsakh is too small to have room for more than one celebrity and Elvis has already been spotted here.
6. He is a fanatical Muslim and fears what the fanatical Christian Armenians would do to him. He knows what we did to all the mercenaries Afghanistan sent over to fight on the side of Azerbaijan.
5. There are no terrorist camps in Artsakh only internationally recognized army bases and everyone knows it (only to Azerbaijan are they terrorist camps).
4. You have to be an Azerbijani propagandist, have a government job, uneducated (oh, I guess I already said that twice, but saying it three times helps get my point across) or someone with an investment in Azerbaijan, to find any logic in this news story.
3. He�s house sitting for Aliev while he�s off in America having his prostatic hypertrophy taken care of in some Cleveland hospital.
2. The Israeli government would never allow it as they want to be able to claim to be the first to host him (Israeli ambassador to Georgia and Armenia Rivka Kohen can better explain how this law works).
1. Even if he was invited in, within 10 minute of his crossing the Iranian boarder, word would reach as far as Talish (the furthest Northern Region of Artsakh) and everyone would be racing to cut his head off so they could collect the $25 million reward.
Azeri spokesman says Bin-Ladin may be in breakaway Karabakh
ANS TV
16 Feb 02
[snip snip]
The head of the [Azerbaijani] Foreign Ministry press service, Matin Mirza, has said that reports about Bin-Ladin's whereabouts in the Caucasus region are dangerous for Azerbaijan, too, because following 11 September events our country is one of those states that immediately supported official Washington in anti-terrorist operations. Mirza noted that combating terrorism is one of the priority issues for Azerbaijan too. As far as the theory that Bin-Ladin's is hiding on the uncontrolled Nagornyy Karabakh territory was concerned, Mirza did not rule this out. Anything can take place on this territory which is under Armenian occupation: from the cultivation of narcotic substances to the burial of atomic waste. Everyone knows that Nagornyy Karabakh has turned into a nest of Armenian terrorists and mercenaries. Azerbaijan is unable to control this territory because the conflict remains unsettled. That is why Azerbaijan is not responsible for crimes committed on the occupied territories, end quote. Esmira Namiqqizi, ANS.
First of all, I would like to say that I am saddened that Bin-Ladin has not come here, because I think turning his body over to the authorities for the $25 million reward would be very helpful to our economy and bring us that much closer to international recognition as an independent nation.
I don�t know who �everyone� is that that Mirza feels that Artsakh is a "nest for terrorists and mercenaries"? I'm sure Mirza is referring to the people that work at Azerbaijan�s MFA.
Mirza is right when saying that they can�t control Artsakh, because it�s not theirs to control. In addition to that, Mirza can rest easy tonight knowing we would never hold Azerbaijan responsible for crimes committed here if they didn�t commit them (that�s for Artsakh�s recognized legal system to determine who is guilty of crimes committed here). And what conflict is Mirza talking about? We settled our conflict with Azerbaijan in 1994. If Mirza meant to say "dispute" over who land belongs to, I can't argue with that. BTW: When are you going to vacate our Shahoumyan region that you occupy?
Oh Mirza, of you happen to read this, here is a little unsolicited advice from me. It�s not a good idea for people who live in glass houses to throw stones. If you didn't understand that, then maybe you will understand the saying that the Western oil companies say about it not being a good idea to play with fire when standing in an oilfield full of oil when you lack a viable way to transport it to the West.
I took a few minutes to write down my top ten reasons why Bin-Ladin is not in Artsakh and this story can�t be true.
10. America would cut off the millions of dollars of aid it gives to Artsakh without evidence.
9. The story is so far fetched that even President Bush and Aliev don�t believe it.
8. Armenians can�t keep secrets and we all would have already heard about it.
7. Artsakh is too small to have room for more than one celebrity and Elvis has already been spotted here.
6. He is a fanatical Muslim and fears what the fanatical Christian Armenians would do to him. He knows what we did to all the mercenaries Afghanistan sent over to fight on the side of Azerbaijan.
5. There are no terrorist camps in Artsakh only internationally recognized army bases and everyone knows it (only to Azerbaijan are they terrorist camps).
4. You have to be an Azerbijani propagandist, have a government job, uneducated (oh, I guess I already said that twice, but saying it three times helps get my point across) or someone with an investment in Azerbaijan, to find any logic in this news story.
3. He�s house sitting for Aliev while he�s off in America having his prostatic hypertrophy taken care of in some Cleveland hospital.
2. The Israeli government would never allow it as they want to be able to claim to be the first to host him (Israeli ambassador to Georgia and Armenia Rivka Kohen can better explain how this law works).
1. Even if he was invited in, within 10 minute of his crossing the Iranian boarder, word would reach as far as Talish (the furthest Northern Region of Artsakh) and everyone would be racing to cut his head off so they could collect the $25 million reward.
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